Retailiquette: How to act in a retail environment. 0

The last time I worked in a retail environment, it drove me absolutely nuts. I do this somewhat literally. Skip to 8 years later, and I’m back in this field again, after saying that I have no desire to do so. Shopping in a store can be stressful, but if you’ve never done retail, you have no fucking clue. I wrote a thing about it a few months back, but here are a few more things that a customer should be aware of in a retail environment.

  • Don’t be a douche. This goes without saying anywhere you go, but this is more or less a way of me saying to be patient. Some workers are using ancient machines that tend to break down once in a while. Or in my case, if someone tells me that they “no longer wants an item” after I’ve scanned it, I have to get a manager to override. Be patient, and don’t take it out on the workers.
  • Make up your damn fucking mind. Nothing annoys the shit out of me more than when I scan something, and then all of the sudden, the customer says “oh no, I don’t want it anymore, it’s too expensive/dirty/etc”. Dirty, understandable. Expensive? I work in a bargain store, chances are you’ll find the same thing somewhere else for double the price. It takes about 10 minutes for me to get a manager to override a void. It kills productivity, and pisses off the people behind you. Keep both of us in mind and try not to do it.
  • Treat the facilities as you would your own home. I was given the nice job of cleaning the bathroom a few weeks ago. The men’s bathroom was practically spotless. Women, why do you feel the need to piss all over, leave your bloody-ass tampons in the toilet, and throw paper around like it’s fucking streamers in the bathroom? Think of it like this: if you were home, would you want someone to come in and piss all over your toilet and leave toilet paper on the ground? I think you’d be rather pissed off. Brandy posted on her FB about a situation at her workplace where she went in to use it and there was SHIT all over. Literally poop everywhere. If you have an accident (shit happens after all), once you clean yourself up, clean up what you can and even be nice and tell someone who works there that there was an issue in the bathroom and they will have someone clean it up. Do your part.
  • Be aware of your surroundings. This is for two reasons: so that you don’t accidentally run over an elderly lady, and so that you don’t ask how much something costs when there’s a price tag right on the merchandise. Some places don’t do this, and the question is legit. But there are many others who put a price tag somewhere near the merchandise. I feel a little more compassion for the elderly and disabled, so if they do bring me something with a tag on it, I will read them the price before scanning it (because, manager overrides).
  • If your kid has to sit INSIDE of the cart, he’s too fucking big. I see kids that are clearly too big for the cart altogether. I’m not talking about the part where you have the little seat, but literally inside the cart. I’ll spare the “back in my day” talk, but pretty sure that having a 70-pound kid sitting in the cart is a safety hazard. If they can use their feet, then they can get out of the cart and walk.